Wow.

This is just incredible.

Ahem.

http://vimeo.com/4093209

Its true. I'm obsessed with Mat Kearney.

Time for an update.

Well, hi friends. Its been awhile, shocking, I know. Sometimes I forget I have this, and then I see on facebook or something that someone has updated their blog and then I remember, wow I need to write on mine.

I FINALLY graduated in February with a Massage Therapy Degree/Certificate. Crazy, huh? Something I have always had on my mind, just never really thought I'd do it. Whats weird is, I was in a class of 6 people all over the age of 30 and I'm so thankful and beyond grateful I have met them. I can't believe I've finally graduated and have something I have always wanted to do at my fingertips. The only problem, finding a job. With the way the economy is right now, I'm honestly just thankful I even have a job, but it would be nice to do something with it, at least part time. So we'll see what happens.

Lately, I've been so thankful for my family. I don't know what it is, but its something about warmer weather, cookouts, campfires, hitting golf balls into the field behind my parents house, etc. I love the fact that Tim and Court are so close, always makes it nice. I honestly don't see myself living in Indiana for the rest of my life, in fact, I'm not even sure I'll be here in March, when our lease is up, but for now I'm going to be content with being here cause I know God has a reason and plan for me while I am here.

I've been doing bootcamp. Yes, bootcamp. Its a 5:15am workout on Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays. I did a session of it in January and it ended at the end of feb, then it started back up 2 weeks ago. I honestly think I underestimated what "bootcamp" really entailed. WOW! It kicks my butt EVERYTIME! Its lots of cardio, strength, spinning, etc. It really has been good, this session the lady I nanny for and Ashley are doing it with me. Always entertaining with the 3 of us, but none of us are really morning people, especially at 5:15am! I mean, who REALLY is?? But its been a blessing in disguise. I've really been trying to get back in shape and eat right and not put bad things in my body, and its been truly good, and refreshing.

I'm letting my hair grow. Not cutting it til at least Christmas. Tim, Court and I had made a bet not to cut our hair, and well Court already lost :) It's ok, her hair got pretty long! Anywho, I love my hair long and always have and I am ALWAYS mad when I cut it and I usually do every summer, but not this year kids. Tim's is actually getting almost as long as mine. How ridiculous is that??


ps. How hot is Zac Efron? Don't hold that against me, please. Oh, and I'm trying to figure out twitter, still don't understand it.

two in one day. get it.

You should do this. Kept me entertained for like, 5 min. Enjoy.

1. Put your MP3 player on shuffle.
2. For each question, press the next button to get your answer.
3. YOU MUST WRITE THAT SONG NAME DOWN NO MATTER HOW SILLY IT SOUNDS! DON'T CHEAT OR YOU'RE LAME


IF SOMEONE SAYS "ARE YOU OK" YOU SAY?
"The long day is over" Norah Jones...interesting.

WHAT WOULD BEST DESCRIBE YOUR PERSONALITY?
"Everybody wants you" Josh Kelley.

WHAT DO YOU LIKE IN A GUY/GIRL?
"Truth Hurts" Usher...really?


WHAT IS YOUR MOTTO?
"say hello, wave goodbye" David Gray.

WHAT DO YOUR FRIENDS THINK OF YOU?
"Smooth Criminal" M. Jackson. Ohh yes.

WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT VERY OFTEN?
"Do You Remember" Jack Johnson. ...wierd...

WHAT IS 2+2?
"Another Day In Paradise" Phil Collins.

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR BEST FRIEND?
"Everything" Lifehouse. Aw.

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THE PERSON YOU LIKE?
"Why can't I" Liz Phair. Haha.

WHAT IS YOUR LIFE STORY?
"A Change is gonna come" Sam Cooke. Hmmm.

WHAT DO YOU THINK WHEN YOU SEE THE PERSON YOU LIKE?
"Today" Joshua Radin.

WHAT DO YOUR PARENTS THINK OF YOU?
"Relentless" Sidewalk Prophets. Huh.

WHAT WILL YOU DANCE TO AT YOUR WEDDING?
"Jack and Diane" John Mellencamp. Well, duh.

WHAT WILL THEY PLAY AT YOUR FUNERAL?
"Naked" Spice Girls. Well, naturally.

WHAT IS YOUR HOBBY/INTEREST?
"Ballad of San Fransico" Caedmon's Call.

WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST SECRET?
"Can't stop now" Keane.

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR FRIENDS?
"We belong together" Mariah Carey. HA! Perfect.

WHAT'S THE WORST THING THAT COULD HAPPEN?
"Haven't seen you for awhile" Pat McGee Band.

HOW WILL YOU DIE?
"What about tomorrow" Oval Opus.

WHAT IS THE ONE THING YOU REGRET?
"The Wanderer" Marc Broussard. Interesting.

WHAT MAKES YOU LAUGH?
"Yesterday Morning" Matt Wertz. Not so much.

WHAT MAKES YOU CRY?
"Dirty Laundry" Don Henley. Well, sometimes.

WILL YOU EVER GET MARRIED?
"The King of wishful thinking" Go West. You have got to be kidding, right? I wish I would cheated on this one.

WHAT SCARES YOU THE MOST?
"Livin' the Blues" Bob Dylan and Johnny Cash.

DOES ANYONE LIKE YOU?
"Where the streets have no name" U2

IF YOU COULD GO BACK IN TIME, WHAT WOULD YOU CHANGE?
"Got Money" Lil' Wayne and T-Pain. HAHAHA. Fair enough.

WHAT HURTS RIGHT NOW?
"Mid-November" Jonathan Rice

penny for your thoughts.

I've done alot of soul searching the past, 6 months or so. I've come to realize, and some of you may already have known this, but I've just built this wall. I mean, HUGE wall around my heart. Its not easy for me to let someone in, friendship wise and relationship wise. I know this, and I'm aware of this but I just wasn't doing anything about it. I have let this wall build so far up that I'm not sure how I'm going to break it down.

I guess the realization for me was, and this is going to sound ridiculously dumb, but its true. I was on facebook the other night and I was on someones page and I saw Lukes profile. "Wow" I thought. I hadn't looked at his page in months. So, I clicked on it. Come to find out we aren't "friends" anymore on facebook. Didn't suprise me. But I don't know why I thought about it so much. I was holding onto something, I'm not sure what, but something. After we ended things, 4 years ago, thats when my wall starting building. I haven't dated anyone since then. WOW! SERIOUSLY! 4 years. Am I that pathetic?? So I sat and thought about that for a while, and I realized the answer to that question is no, I'm not that pathetic. He was my first love, and those stick with you for the rest of your life. I know 100% I'm not supposed to be with him, but for some reason it just ate away at me. I've become so bitter and so heartless towards guys that I have just pushed and pushed guys away. Not that I have them knocking down my door, but you know what I mean.

So I'm turning over a new leaf. I never do new years resolutions and I realize that its the 29th of January, but its never too late to make a resolution right? Even if it is, I'm doing it. I'm going continue to demolish that wall and not allow it to build up again. I also question whether or not I'm scared of marriage or committment. I don't think I'm scared of committment, but sometimes the thought of marriage scares me. Not that I don't want to be married, cause I do someday, and its not the whole "being with one person for the rest of your life" idea either, I don't knwo what it is. Marriage is hard, you gotta work at it everyday, so I've been told, and I guess I just haven't found that "someone" that I'm willing to make it work with. I know that I'm only 24, and I've got "plenty of time" so my mother tells me, but if you look at all my friends, except for the handful that are still single like me, *let me hear ya ladies and gents!* they are either engaged, married or having kids. NOT THAT THERES ANYTHING WRONG WITH IT, and I know thats not what God has in store for my life just yet, but its just depressing sometimes, ya know? Let me be dramatic for a minute, ok!

But hey, I have patience and I can wait, but HOW LONG DO I GOTTA WAIT?!?! :) Alright, I apologize for anyone who has read this and think that I'm a complete drama queen and want a pity party, cause I definitely don't. Just my thoughts today.

Oh, its been awhile.

Wow, its been awhile huh? I was reading Courtneys blog and I realized that I hadn't wrote on my mine in like 5 months. Thats ridiculous! I mean, I highly doubt alot of people check to see if I updated, but for the one person that may, here you go. I have listed below what has happened in the past 6 months, random thoughts of mine, etc. So, enjoy.

-I realize that I love the cold weather and the snow more then ever this year, and I don't know why.
-I graduate in a month, and that scares the living crap out of me.
-I love my job and my time with Ali more then ever now, shes 16 months old, walking, "talking", and dancing. She has more of a personality then most people I know. Shes free, fearless, content....something I envy.
-Christmas was a blurr to me. 2 weeks before Christmas my dad had a massive heart attack, and it seems as if we all slept through Christmas this year. One of those moments "I never thought this would happen to our family" and when it actually did, its like we didn't know how to respond to it.
-I have an obsession with fruity cheerios.
-I started this thing called bootcamp, and its at 5:15am on tuesdays and thursdays and its a full hour of strength and cardio. Hell? yes, it is. I think I underestimated the title "bootcamp."
-I leave to go on a cruise at the beginning of march, and I'm really excited cause I've never been on one before! Hopefully I don't get motionsick. ew.
-I'm getting a new car. FINAAALLLY!! I've gotten to the point that I'm sick of being stranded on the side of the road. Shes been a good car, but its time to move on.
-I'm sick of guys, in general.
-I miss knoxville more then ever these past couple months. Not sure why, but I do.
-I've decided that I'm giving myself a year in Indy to figure out what I want to. I've applied to many jobs, none of which are in Indy. Interesting, huh?
-I'm the maid of honor in one my best friends weddings this year, and I have NO idea where to start with that!! But HOW EXCITING!!! "always a bridesmaid, never a bride" ---thank you mother.
-I've been church hunting for the past 6 months, and I hate that. I've been to many and just haven't felt that "click" yet.
-I miss my friends, alot.
-I'm OBSESSED with tv lately. I have a show everynight, sometimes 2 or 3 in one night. Its getting ridiculous.
-Its taken me awhile to get here, but God is so much bigger then I ever imagined.


...I think this is it for now. I'm got to go play "kitchen" with Ali.

**love, peace and chicken grease** (who can name that movie???)